I Hate Being Last to Know....

Don't you absolutely HATE it when someone goes to you and tells you something like, "I know something that you don't know?"!?!?!?!? Don't you get so freakin' curious that you can't stop thinking about that thing that your friend knows that you can't know? I don't know about you, but when that happens, I start thinking about it like crazy and start investigating and then I want to punch everyone until I find out.

Well, something like this happened a few days ago. And of course, the "thing" that I didn't know and wasn't "allowed" to know had to do something with me. And of course, it had to relate to a guy, or else it wouldn't have been juicy enough to post up on here... ha.ha.ha.

It all started when a friend of mine came up to me and said, "Steph, are you ready for the upcoming events?" I had no idea what she was talking about and I asked. She goes, "HA! I can't tell you!! And no one knows about it except for me!" And ran away.

At first I thought she was just playing around since she just came out of the shower and I just went back to doing my homework. But then the evilness came in my head and I started to think of all these possibilities of what she could have meant. So then I found my friend and BEGGED her to tell me. It must have been good gossip stuff since she told me that none of our friends knew. I HAD TO KNOW.

My friend wouldn't tell me directly at first. She asked me things like, "What do you think about person #1" which was her boyfriend and I answered honestly.

"What do you think about person #2?" which was our friend's boyfriend and I answered honestly.

"What do you think about person #3?" which was one of our friends. I answered honestly, but she stopped me and specified about what I thought about him in terms of looks and personality. I answered honestly.

"What do you think about person #4?" which is another one of my friends, and I answered honestly.

This is when I realized...... it was about someone who must have had a thing for me. And I knew exactly who she was talking about. Let's call him 000. How much more obvious could she get? She was saving that guy for last because he is in our group of friends..... *sigh*

And my friend, being a girl, she had to spill everything out because we started to talk about the good stuff. First of all, to make things seem a bit more understandable, I'll mention how the guys who are single in my group of friends are known to play with girls. They're not bad guys, they're great friends, but it's just that when it comes to partying and pretty girls, they kinda suck hahaha. So my friend told me how this all started. Her and 000 were having a conversation over text. And it was all about how she doesn't like how he and the other guys are basically players and quitters (? I think that's how she described them... quitters. I dunno she talks thug and I don't lol). She was trying to tell him to stop messing around with girls so much because she thinks its wrong. Like it's cool to party and meet up with girls, but not making the girls believe things exist when they don't care. And 000 took her words into consideration and told her that he was going/wanted to change. And the last text was basically saying how 000 was now going to try his chances with me.

When I heard this story, I was just jaw-dropping. Not because I thought this was sweet and I was happy that someone liked me. But because..... AHHH I can't explain directly. There's just a back story to this too, which I will summarize:

I met 000 in the middle of last semester. So this was after my friend problems and I started to hang out with the people I hang out with today. When I would study with them, and since I started to hang around them, I got to know 000 more and a couple of other people. I was still upset how I was treated by my old group and how I still felt like I had no friends and I would have a sad face without knowing it around that time. 000 would always ask and even text me about it. I came up with two reasons for that. Number one, he was, and still is, close friends with my roommate at that time and if you remember, she was a part of the crazy old group of friends that I had and I have no doubt that she told him about it since she told a lot of random people about it. Number two, I had a feeling that he was getting interested in me.... Since it was just a guess, I just ignored that possibility and lived on with life. But when I think about it.... he did text me a lot and always attempted to take care of me when I was drunk or something.... errrrrr.

So. yeah. I told my friend that and also that I have absolutely NO INTEREST in 000 and never had. He was just a friend to me and that's how far it'll get. My friend was of course curious about why I had no interest because she did think that he was a good guy and stuff. So we talked about our past. She told me about her personal stories about her past relationships and current one and I told her how I've never dated anyone still. When I told her that I was single my entire life, I got the usual " OMG I don't believe you!" or "You're serious? I bet you're lying" type of stuff. But at the same time she told me that she kind of expected that from me because now that she knows me, she sees the "innocent" side to me aside from my open dirty mind and perverted-ness.

Actually, the more openly perverted you are, the more innocent... Kinda true I guess.

Anyway, after talking she jokingly told me that I'm a heartbeaker since I just can't like 000 back. But she understood why and concluded that I'm just not interested dating and that I'm just not ready. (To me it's I'm not interested and he's not my type... LOL I'm bad) THIS WAS ALL JUST DAY ONE


The next day, I noticed that 000 started to text me a lot again. We barely texted each other since school ended and because I've been busy I've barely even seen him this school year. But I treated it as if I never had that conversation with my friend the night before and texted away like I normally did.

But my inner girl gossip spirit had to tell someone else about it. And I turned to my best Korean friend JH who's also in our group of friends. I told her everything and during that entire time I was talking, she had a smirk on her face. Then I had her tell me what she knew....

And these are the things she knew:
1. She's known that 000 has liked me since I started being friends and that he even TALKED TO HER ABOUT IT. The reason why she never told me this was because she knew that I wouldn't have been interested and that it was unnecessary (I love her because she's so reasonable like that)

2. EVERYONE has known that 000 has at least had interest in me since last year.

3. Last Friday night, I went partying with another group of friends and that night, she and my friends had their own small party. And since I was the only one that wasn't there, JH asked 000 directly in FRONT OF EVERYONE if he still liked me. JH said that he said I don't know, but was like turning red....

4. That same night 000 was opening up to JH and hold her that he thinks that he's creeping me out by texting too much and that I'm too good for him etc. (drunk talk? lol) And JH was just encouraging him to text me more ( LOL I love JH for that too. She's just honest hahaha)

So yeah... Last night too, I tested it out if my friends knew too since NO ONE but those two girls had actually told me that they knew about 000. While we were eating dinner, everyone but two guys were at the table with me for a few minutes. I asked if 000 was going to this event that I invited everyone to go to. And the two guys looked at each other and started laughing and told me "Why don't you call him or text him if he's going?" ... I hate them hahaha

Anyway. I'm just ranting about this because I hate it when you're the last to know about things and it ends up being about you... And this is kind of a re-run of how I have guys like me that I DON'T LIKE in that way....

I have yet to see 000 since the first days of school. We'll see how things go lol.




WHY CAN'T I FIND A TALL KOREAN GUY THAT HAS A GDRAGONLIKE ATMOSTPHERE?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

MBLAQ's Mona Lisa Fashion and Style

OK!!!!!! New post about getting MBLAQ's style in their music video Mona Lisa, which you can check out here:

(The quality is not as good as the other videos you can find on youtube, but that video belongs to the official youtube account and I want it to get more views muahaha)

Apparently, MBLAQ got a new fashion coordinator, which is pretty obvious because when I first watched this MV, I was like "wow.... they looks SOOO much sexier for some reason". If you watch their first music video "Oh Yeah", their clothes looked pretty good for a brand new group and them pulling up their shirts was definitely eye candy for girls lol.

Then you go on and see Y, and wtf they're like a fashionable superman or something.

Anyway, good for them for looking really stylish now. And as a matter of fact, the style that they're pulling off so well in Mona Lisa is my FAVORITE for both guys and girls. Why? Because it's a more mature yet young look, it's really stylish, and it goes perfect with the fall/autumn season that's coming up! If I had the money, I'd be buying clothes like this all the time and going out. If I had a boyfriend or some guy that I can play dress up with (haha funny thought), I'd be putting on clothes and showing him off.

I'm only going to elaborate on three of my favorite outfits shown in the music video... And don't worry, although these are guys, girls can definitely wear basically the same thing and pull it off just as well! (don't think it's because supposedly all Korean guys look girly....)


So there are three different looks in the MV. 

The first look you see when they walk in:

This look as a white and "wild" thing going on with the leopard print, and the eagle on Lee Joon's sleeveless shirt.



Second look is when then you see them dance in this abandoned building with a random gas station inside:

This is my favorite of the three looks and it's mostly black with hints of red (always a Fall combo). I'm loving the American flag print on Mir's pants, looks so funny! Anyway, it looks mature and of course, stylish. And trust me, girls and guys can wear this and look good.



And finally, the third is when they're outside of the building and in the parking lot thing:
(and wtf is with Mir's wingflap stuff? lol)

This look involves a lot of print and patterns, which is honestly very easy to find and wear....

So I guess I will explain this look. Just find a loose shirt with a print/pattern that is eye catching in a good way, simple accessories, maybe put on a jacket or blazer, and then wear simple jeans/leggings to tone the overall look down. If you wear print legging, you're gonna look stupid and crazy.... lol. Shoes/heels should be colorful.

Now here is outfit #1 ----- Thunder's outfit!

Here, Thunder is wearing a black mesh shirt. I've looked at quite a few places, a mesh shirts are a little hard to grab your hands on, and if you do, they're usually pricey. YesStyle has mesh items (for men and women), but like I said, it's pricey and if you want to get Thunder's style exactly, most likely you have to get a guy's shirt. Recently a lot of mesh stuff has been made as outerwear for swim suits or active wear, but you "always" have to wear something under. I don't think Thunder is wearing anything under but whatever. If you're a girl, please don't be all skanky and wear nothing under or just a bra... 344 has mesh tanks, and although they're really stretchy, they're so tight if you have the slightest bulge of fat it's going to be shown...

The white vest is a little longer than the vests you see in nowadays fashion (they're usually short up to the waist), but honestly, that can work too. Thunder's vest has these black belt strips, but those were most likely put on by hand. Really, any pure white vest with little black or whatever color details can work.

What I don't like about this outfit though are the pants... Thunder wears print leggings under a kilt or very baggy knee shorts. Actually I think it's a kilt. I personally think it makes you're legs look shorter. I guess you could do that but.... *cough*. What I think is a street-friendlier choice is to wear black and white leggings, maybe not as much pattern, or for the more conservative, skinny black jeans or simple leggings.

Shoes - figure it out yourself. It's infinite.

This is from Urban Outfitters and it's actually on sale now for only $19.99. I HAVE THE BEIGE ONE AHH I LOOOVE IT!

Outfit #2 ----- Lee Joon's outfit!

Lee Joon make's me drool, so I'm sure if a guy wears what he's wearing, he'll make me drool too. If a girl wears it and pulls it off, damn, she's just hot and stylish. Anyway, his look is very simple as it's all black. What I love about it is that although it's all black, it doesn't look plain. The only problem is that you should be skinny/thin to wear this because of the style of pants he's wearing.

I LOVE his shirt. It's fit yet it looks loose and baggy and has a deep scoop neck thing - it adds curiosity because people like me want to see skin lol. You may think these shirts are easy to find, BUT THEY'RE NOT!

On top of that, he's wearing a tight mesh or knit cardigan. It doesn't look like it but IT IS a bit see through. The good thing about mesh or knit is that they stretch and fit you easily and show off your curves lol. The cardigan is the average cardigan length and has no buttons whatsoever. This is also hard to find... I searched many stores and they just don't make mesh things in this country or pretty knit cardigans.....

The hardest part of the outfit to pull of are the harem pants. I, as well as every Korean, call them "ddong ba-ji" or "poop pants" because they look like you took a shit in your pants LOL! I just learned recently that they're called harem pants. Anyway, you MUST be thin to wear them because they make your legs look shorter and fatter, usually. But the one Lee Joon is wearing is pretty nice because the baggy part of his bottoms aren't that low. And girls can wear the ones that end in the middle of the shin because they're cute.


Outfit #3 ----- Mir's outfit!

Mir's outfit is pretty cute and honestly, it kinda only works for guys. But whatever, I don't care.
I'm loving his dark red shirt because of the print on it. It's simple, clean and it doesn't hurt my eyes. Any dark color can work, but red is always paired with black for fall style. So good luck trying to find something like that in stores.

On top, he's wearing a very simple black collar button up shirt whatever the hell you call it. But it can't be just any one because his is long sleeved (just rolled up which gives it more style) and it has that extra thing on top of the shoulders with the snap on, gold buttons. Those things give more volume to your shoulders like shoulder pads, and it gives it a more edgy feel which fall fashion is always about. And the collar should come out like this. If you don't like that, any other black blazer or collared jacket can work just as well.

As for bottoms, simple black skinny jeans work the best. And if you want you can add any flag of your choice on the front, top half of your pants. Or just simple chains can do the job.




I hope my explanation's gave a little more insight of what the MBLAQ members wore in their awesome music video! And I hope you can go shopping with a bit more ease on what kind of look you want to wear when you go out on the streets (or you can dress up your boyfriend as a gift hahhaa). Of course, you can vary it to however you want to, it's all up to you. It's already hard enough to find pretty clothes the way I want in stores... (Online shopping is the best because you can buy stuff from across the freaking world)

I promise, If you just follow what I said, you can be looking like MBLAQ and stylish for the fall :)

First Days of School

IT'S BEEN TOO LONG!

Ok, so I'm officially a SOPHMORE at my college. It's already my 5th day here and 3rd day of classes! And so far, it's actually been EXTREMELY GOOD. School-wise and friend-wise. And I'll talk about the boring stuff first and get into the more juicy gossip-worth stuff >:)

So just to let you know a but about what happened to me last year, I REALLY screwed up the beginning of my freshmen year academically and socially later in the year. But thankfully, everything got a little better near the end.

I mean, my grades are still ehhh, but this year, I'm GETTING THAT 4.0!!! The classes I'm taking this semester seem pretty easy. I'm taking 4 altogether. One of those four I'm retaking due to my stupidity in the beginning of my freshmen year, so that shouldn't be too bad. Another is pretty interesting since it's about Chinese literature and the professor seems really intelligent and I feel smarter when I'm around him. And the other two are science classes with labs (UGH) but science comes easily for me, AND they're intro classes! 4.0 sounds very possible!!

And I just changed my major today into Microbiology. Before I was a Communications major, but the program here sucks and my dad wanted to kill me since my dreams of being in Public Relations was too stupid and materialistic for him, and after that a Computer Science major, which those who know me know that I failed terribly in that class (lol.... not).

But changing my major seems like a real new and fresh start for me, and it also means I'm one step closer in being a PLASTIC SURGEON!! (YES I WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE FAKE, BUT FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES AND PRETTY!)

My GPA is still going to hurt me until the last days of my Senior year, but the past is the past. What's done is done. It's a brand new time, there are brand new faces to be seen, and now I'm much wiser than ever before.

BUT OF COURSE (!!) some things are the same. ( Like how I'm transitioning to my social stuff??)
So as I mentioned before, I had huge drama near Spring break and on until the very end. If you knew what happened, you would know that it was COMPLETELY STUPID, and I didn't deserve the shit I got and that the other party was (and still is) super immature about stuff.

So since this is a new year and stuff, I thought that the guy that I had the biggest problem with wasn't going to be there since he graduated back in the summer time. But one day, I visited my old dorm to say hi to some old friends and as I was about to go into one room, I heard laughing..... Very familiar sounding too. And all of a sudden someone told me that the guy I had problems with AND EVERYONE ELSE that I had problems with in the past were ALL in the room!! Seriously, I knew that he was a dumbass, but DAMN, he must be fucking really dumb for taking ANOTHER semester here in school!! (Most kids would just take summer classes to "seem" that they graduated on time, but the really dumb ones stay much longer....)

So that was one thing that really made me sad/angry/depressed. But it's new times right? I'm over it and I'm totally willing to say hi when I see his face... But let me get going..

Then that same night, I went to eat with all of me friends and of course along the way of getting food I saw a bunch of other people that I knew. One of them was my good Korean friend. As we hugged I met eyes with none other than, my ex-roommate (yes she and I had problems too because she was on the same side as the dumbass dude). Again I thought, It's a new year, who cares?!, and said hi to her also as I was still hugging with my Korean buddy. And what does that bitch do? Look down and wave shyly........ Ok, it may not sound that bad, but trust me, that's totally different than her normal personality and it just showed CLEARLY that she still had problems with me... And the funny thing was that that bitch told the other girls that were sitting at the table, and they treated me differently too last year, but even they were all happy to see me and hugged me too when I saw them that night.

Last night was kinda funny too.... My friends and I went to eat dinner and that time, I just saw EVERYONE. The dumbass dude, my ex-roommate, and just everyone else that got involved and were against me. There was ONLY ONE GUY in that group of friends that understood what I was going through last year and he was the only one that actually talked to me normally for the rest of the year. When I saw him, I gave him a big hug and he still remembered my Korean name, Heekyung, and we were all good. And when I sat down to eat with my friends, guess who were sitting behind me and sitting at the other table next to me.... ALL OF THOSE ASSHOLES. I clearly made eye contact with the dumbass dude, but before I could say hi, he literally turned his head away and walked really fast away. (That's so mature Mr. 22 year old....)

But I didn't care. No one was willing to say hi to me but it didn't get to me. I was sitting with MY friends and having a good time and staring and eating the strange sushi that had rice crispies all over it. But while we were eating, that one good guy that calls me by my Korean name, kept on yelling out "Heekyung! Heekyung!" to just talk about how our summers were and stuff. He was sitting at the table next to mine and he was RIGHT NEXT to Dumbass. Dumbass and the others didn't look at me or the nice guy at all while we were talking.

What really pissed me off though was what when I got up to get more food and water, I saw Dumbass, ex-roomie, and others all get up and talk to my friends that were sitting with me ( my friends don't know anything negative about my relationship with them and they're chill with them)...... And when they started to notice that I was coming back, they all went back to sit down........ And then I overheard my ex-roommate say "Oh we should sit together for lunch, just us, next time!"

-___________-

yo... wtf? She's like... still trying to get in my space.

And I just remembered... She visited my dorm the other day and she would NOT get near me and I overheard her talking about me in a kinda awkward/rude way to one of my friends.... bitch

Anyway, I guess things will never change. But I know better and I don't need them HA


Here's the good part of the first few days though!!
I didn't realize how much I missed my friends until I saw them altogether and when we were all talking again. I really missed how we would just all sit in one stuffy room and just talk about random things that pop up in our minds. And to them, I'm still known as dirty mind haha. The dorm that I'm living is pretty fun because a lot of my friends are on the same floor and the girls and I take showers together while the guys just chill in their room and do.. stuff lol.

And I'm also making a whole other group of friends since I am now a part of KSA (Korean Student Organization). I'm the newest member on the e-board as the media chair ( which is time consuming, but fun since I make all of the event posters and facebook stuff ). Everyone on the e-board were already really close with each other and I was really worried about fitting in since I was the new one. I only know most of them but could only say a "hi"/"bye" thing. But they gladly took me in with open arms and they're all so friendly! Guess I can't escape the Koreans! lol

I guess all I can really say is that I am SO THANKFUL for having the friends that I have. Some who know about my past drama understand me and still talk to me since they know me as who I am and not by my mistakes. I'm happy that I'm making a lot of new friends easily through KSA. And even though I'm getting extremely busy because of KSA and classes, my friends are still my friends since they respect and understand that I can't always be there and I love them for that and I am happy!!

And that's it for now! Hopefully things won't get anymore sour than I've experienced so far and even if they do, I know I always have others to back me up ;)

Deleting deleting deleting

Okay, so I've been wondering whether or not I should delete even more posts.... I've already deleted quite a few and the reason for that was because I didn't want my blog to become filled with hate and rant posts..... The main purpose for my blog was to post about the things I love and my "fun" life.....

Obviously I strayed kinda far from that if you read my past posts... And even the last two are both hating on something. But I can't find myself to delete those because the things I talked about are TRULY about how I feel, so I guess I'll keep them - just hope that I don't seem like a disgusting person, but whatever it's your opinion.

I deleted my other posts not only because they were depressing and yucky, but also because I want to erase it from my memory. Those previous posts reflected on how hurt and mistreated I was from certain people and how depressed I felt on certain events. Those events hurt me so much that I just wanted to get it out of my head, but the way I do that is write it all down somewhere. If it was in a notebook, eventually I'd rip the page out to kinda symbolize that it's not worth remembering anymore and that I should just throw it away. And I guess on here, I'd just delete it.

Anyway, my "deleting" hasn't stopped from there. Recently I've also been deleting a lot of pictures on my Facebook and untagging myself in many more. Some pictures were just getting old, so I had to delete and untag myself from them. But most of the pictures that I had to untag myself from were my freshmen college pictures. If you read my previous depressing posts, you'd know that my freshmen college year wasn't the best thing to ever want to remember again (plus I don't want pictures of me super red and beer cans all around me do I?). I literally untagged myself in EVERY college picture I could find except for like two because I'm still good friends with the girl I'm in the picture with.

As I was continuously untagging myself, I was still looking through the pictures and it just made me feel even more sad and depressed... Why didn't I just live through a normal college year? 99% of all college kids have a blast in their freshmen year and I just happen to be in that 1% that struggled through it.... But the pictures said something else... I looked like I was having a ton of fun... It looked like I had a ton of friends. I looked liked I went out all the time and overall led a healthy, typical American college student life. I even took down my favorite New York trip pictures.... I saw pictures from my first stupid frat parties with my first girl friends and we all looks so happy in them. I saw pictures of me and my friends all dressed up and dancing and posing. But the pictures didn't tell everything I went through, which was why I had to delete and untag myself in ALL of those pictures.

(funny thing too... there were some pictures I really really really wanted to keep because I looked really pretty and skinny in them.... but I couldn't be biased and shallow lol)

Anyway, know I have this thought in my head... Does deleting everything actually make me feel better? In a way, it kinda does. I actually DO feel like none of that has happened before because nothing is there for me to be reminded of them! If I can't remember those bad times, what is there for me to be sad about? And I also feel as if I'm free from those bad memories and nothing pulls me down anymore. For example, when I had friend issues, I was constantly reminded of them and it was really hard for me to get my confidence back to make new friends. Now, there's nothing to hold me back and I'm more excited than ever to meet new people. Deleting those posts and pictures and everything else related makes me feel free.

I guess the only "sad" part of doing all of this is that I DID have those memories and it's just showing that I missed out a lot in life and now I'm just erasing everything. It's kind of (KIND OF) of like "running away" which most people in this world can agree that running away is a cowardly and stupid thing to do.

But my personality can care less. I just have to have the best interest of keeping myself healthy and happy, so if deleting and throwing away memories is how it works for me, then I'll do it.

And I'm not trying to encourage people to delete and throw away every physical thing that reminds them of something bad. I mean, I get into a ton of fights with my dad, but I don't rip up and burn every picture I have with him or throw away his shoes or something. I just write what happened down, think about it for some time, and then throw away those papers. I'm just saying that writing things down and throwing it away can really help you feel better in a pretty healthy way and you feel free of it after. (I guess you can keep it... ButI don't think keeping every negative piece you write is such a good idea because, well, it's not happy.) As for the pictures on Facebook, you might as well delete and untag every picture because you'll eventually get sick of them lol. Just kidding, just give it some thought like I did.

.....................

STILL! Why do I still keep some depressing posts when I already deleted a lot of other ones? Well again, I just feel strongly about those things I've written about, especially my "ugly" post.

In the end, I just have to give it a lot of thought about deleting memories from my past. Only I can look after myself and I have to look forward to live a happy and eventful life! Don't let stupid crap make you feel any less about yourself!

THUMBS UP! from One Two's single "Very Good!" 'cuz you deserve it lol
peace&love

I MADE A NEW DISCOVERY ABOUT YESSTYLE + birthday?

SUPER SLEEPY but this will be quick, I promise!!

And Simmie, if you're reading this, let's talk when I wake up okay? hehehe finally we will be able to talk!

SO. Today is officially my birthday, but I honestly have nothing to be really excited about since I HAVE TO WORK UNTIL FREAKING 9 PM and on top of that, my mom's bible study group thing is coming over... So instead of celebrating my coming to the world with people I actually have fun with and care about, there are going to be I think 3 different Korean families with really young children - starting to dislike kids a lot now - AND OUR CHURCH'S HEAD PASTOR will be with me the moment I get back from work... The pastor dude is apparently going to pray for all of our families and the leader of the bible group thing told me that she's going to have a strawberry shortcake and a bunch of prayers all ready for me for my awesome birthday.

HOW EXCITING! ...............................................

I'm ready to kill myself. 

Seriously, I'm already a bit "ehh" feeling that I have to work on my birthday, but have religious stuff going on? OH HELL NO. And yeah, it's nice and all for you to get a strawberry shortcake for me, but unfortunately, I don't like strawberries in cake. I like to pig out on something with chocolate, but whatever I guess it's unhealthy for the adults and kids that will be there. whoop-de-doo

Aside from all of that junk, I'm not particularly excited for my birthday in the first place. I have like.... no one REALLY close to me, friend-wise, that lives near me anymore and I would personally love to just go out with my sisters and my cousins from Korea and just chill and then dress up and go eat at someplace nice, but they're not here yet....

PLUS - I don't want anything for my birthday either that is actually possible to get. I want plane tickets to Korea for next year summer. Or money to allow me to transfer to Boston University. Or a perfect husband already set up for me. I guess the only real thing I can ask for is a new iPod because mine is so old now that it can't sync with any computer now and some money.

With that money that I know that I'll be getting since, yeah I'm freakin' 19 now, that's the only good thing that you can get from Korean families at that age, I can buy a bunch of clothes online.

SOOOO I went on YesStyle.com to just check out the styles that they had so that I can go on cheaper sites to get similar styles. Then I discovered something about this site.

THERE ARE SAME PIECES OF CLOTHING FOR DIFFERENT PRICES.

Okay, maybe it's not that great but still... I was just...disappointed. I know that YesStyle doesn't make the prices - it's the individual companies that are hosted by YesStyle that decides the price. And Asians all copy from each other and order from the same designer company - so it's very common to see the same pieces of clothes at different shops. But this is ONLINE and I thought things were just better than that.

What I saw:

S.Korean "brand", BBON-J has this "convertible hooded knit cardigan" for freaking $58.50

And the next two pictures were on the page for this..

And then I found that S. Korean "brand", JUNY has an "asymmetric-hem hooded knit cardigan" for $52.20.

And then here are two pictures from this brand page:

OH MAI GAHD THEY'RE THE SAME :O

Okay, okay, it's not even a huge price difference, but I'm cheap and picky. (Who want's to pay $50+ on this kinda ugly thing anyway?) Seriously, this is online. You can try to hassle and bargain with prices in real life if you find the same clothing at a different store, but online you can't. This is just another way to rip people off easily. Thanks online clothing websites.

(funny thing is... the one that's priced higher is advertised better as the girl is prettier and more stylish looking. People are just too smart to rip off poor people like me. >M<)

But yeah. Lesson of the day, do your "research" when online shopping for better deals.

Goodnight. Hopefully I'll have an alright birthday.

Kinda Quick

This will be quick since I'm really sleepy and I just want to update my blog with something that isn't as negative as my last post lol. And it's been only a few days I think, but it feels like a month has already passed because a lot of things happened and today was the first day that I actually got to RELAX.

I know I've been really moody in the past posts, but I think everything has gotten a bit better since I haven't seen or talked to any shitheads lately. I can't remember what I did in the last week, but it has been busy. I remember that I was left behind to go to Six Flags and I missed out on a ton.... Especially when everyone told me that I could've been REALLY GOOD friends with D2 after..... My sisters now have a much better impression of him now that they know him - figures... I'm true to my word when I said that I don't have interest in him anymore, but I am still curious of how he is like. And because I missed out on meeting new people and just getting to know his true personality, it does bother me.

Then I know that James and Angela slept over our house the same day they went to Six Flags and that was fun because they told me a lot about D2 and the different scenarios I could've been in with him and his girlfriend lol. And I found out that he is going to Boston University (FUCKING JEALOUS) but that's funny because I plan to go there a lot when the school year comes around ;) So who knows?

Then I know that we all went to church together. They had no fun because they felt awkward with our church people - which is understandable since I don't really enjoy my church that much and that day everyone was just being a poo. And one of the girls from the 4th of July thing showed COMPLETE DISRESPECT to James which obviously pissed me and James off since he didn't do anything so damaging to deserve that, but I told him that we're better than her since we didn't say anything back to make ourselves become better than her. We just let her soak in her own wants and needs. But other than James and Angela complaining about how boring our church was compared to theirs (well DUH you don't know anyone, that's how my sisters felt when they visited their church but it's okay since they're still young and they didn't bother us too much about it) but I thought it was actually the first time that I enjoyed going to church in a long time. For the first time in a long time, I talked to other people in my church other than the girls (I avoid them now since they're shitheads anyway lol) and it was fun. There's this one guy who's actually Christina's age, but I like him a lot as a friend. And he always bugs me about me buying Dunkin' Donuts for him since I'm the nuna. He and this other guy - he's got swag lolol - were both talking to each other and for once I went up to them to bother them and we talked quite a bit. Then the guy wanted to go and get drinks and the deal was he'd take me if I bought him something haha. The three of us drove together and I bought them drinks - they were really nice about it since they bought the cheapest thing - they didn't want me to spend a lot on them unlike some shitheads cuz we're all chill. And I bought one large coolata for my sisters and James and Angela to share, but one of the shitheads kinda misunderstood and drank some for herself -____-

Other than that, that was a good day as we also watched the last of the Harry Potter series. And THANK GOD it's over because the series suck. Only the third movie was good. I haven't even seen the last 2. And the movie was bad. The ending was worse. Ron is fat now. That's all that I could really remember. But it was fun just being together.

And today I just feel super accomplished - not that I did anything amazing. But since I stayed home ALL DAY with no bad things happening, I just feel good. I woke up feeling good. Ate a decent amount of food that didn't make me feel fat at all. Watched a bunch of stuff online. And drew some stuff. I haven't drawn in SO LONG and when I started to draw, I felt really happy and proud of what I drew. It came out pretty good for someone who hasn't drawn since... I don't even know. I love it when I fill up the entire paper with similar drawings and I was doing that today. Well, I didn't fill up the entire page, but I will soon. And hopefully I'll gain enough skill to draw clothes again. I really want to draw 2NE1 style soon! WITH THEIR FACES!

Anyway. I just feel good today. Hopefully I'll feel this good for a while, at least until my birthday... which is coming up real soon!